Octopus Love: A Fun Kid Activity from Education.com

Hey everyone! I hope you’re enjoying Fall so far. It’s my favorite season: crisp, but not freezing. The leaves turn pretty colors and the world smells of cinnamon. Plus, the kids go back to school… yay! Brontë is a Kindergartener now, and her little sister Bridget really wishes she were too. I know, because she […]

My Kid Is SO Over Tom & Jerry

So my kids were watching Tom and Jerry this morning when my daughter Brontë finally stood up to announce: “Well, the mouse won AGAIN. Like ALWAYS.” And stomped off in disgust. “But if the cat won, that would be the end of the show,” I tell her. “Yeah, so the mouse is gonna SAVE THE […]

My Daughter Starts Bullsh*tting Her Friends

Okay, so I’ve mentioned how watching little kids is hilarious because all the starter adult elements are already there, along with a belief in magic and an underdeveloped sense of self-consciousness… (This whole self-consciousness deal was a huge conundrum for me, as a parent, because I find myself eternally balancing the need to NOT teach […]

Bee Stings and Toddler Vengeance

As you’ve probably guessed, I’m pretty fond of my kids and of being a mom, overall. Maybe it’s the whole dedicated-parenting-blog-thing that gave it away, or how I kind of flipped out on the anti-child childfree folks a while back… But I have to admit that I’m a bigger fan of kids than I am […]

My Childrens’ Dark Side Emerges

I was always a strange child. When I was seven, I used to cover my drawings with another piece of paper, shaded in black, so you’d have to hold it up to the light to see the images behind it. One was of a beautiful dead woman at the bottom of the sea, draped in […]

Viking Role Reversals

So, Bridget the Viking has been rapidly civilizing ever since her big sister Brontë started Kindergarten a few weeks ago. Gone are the sudden, inexplicable tantrums that would alarm neighbors living two blocks away. She doesn’t throw Legos at cats anymore, or refuse to eat anything while simultaneously screaming about how hungry she is. She’s […]

Ice, Ice Baby (AKA- Introverted Dog People)

I used to consider myself an introvert until I met my husband and started having conversations like the one we had last week. We were driving to our very first Back-To-School night because Brontë is starting Kindergarten. It’s a milestone, so I was pretty excited. But my husband seemed out of sorts. He kept braking […]

Leveling Up The Parenting Game

One of the most frustrating parts of parenting is when you’re struggling to cope with brand new life equations as more veteran parents chuckle about how you don’t even know. Like, you’ll be dealing with morning sickness and ill-timed incontinence while constantly hearing: Just WAIT until the baby is born… Then you’re losing your mind from […]

My Daughter Slams Me For Not Taking Her to France Already

My five-year-old daughter and I are eating lunch when she casually starts reminiscing… Brontë: So I really enjoyed seeing the Eiffel Tower with you… Me: We haven’t been there yet. Brontë: Yeah, I’m PRETENDING. Me: Oh, okay. So, we could see the entire city from far above… Brontë: Because SOMEONE hasn’t taken me yet. Me: […]

When Trying to Be Cute Backfires

Struggling to Make Her Eat: A Dialogue Between Mom and Her 5-year-old Child (That mother is me. I’m the mom in this scenario.) Scene: It’s lunchtime. Mom has lovingly prepared a princess-pink divider plate with a bean burrito and a handful of strawberries, with the stems scooped out, because her daughter has loved strawberries since […]